...When You Lose Your Boys

The first time I lost (and I mean really lost) one of my kids was about two years ago at the mall.  At the time, I had Lucy in the baby carrier with Gus tagging along.  We were in a department store.  Gus purposefully ran away from me... and ran fast.  Before I knew it, he was out of sight.  This department store not only had one large entry way into the mall, but it also had several exits to the parking lot.  He must have been missing for 20 minutes before the security guards found him.

A Boy & His Legos (Noah, age 6)

After Timmy was born, Nick and I thought it would be fun to take all five kids to Legoland.  Ultimately, we had a blast!  However, we had another scare at the water park.  Somehow, Noah disappeared.  Nick and I were so confused, because there was no where for him to have gone, yet he was no where in sight.  Nick was so nervous and began searching the water park.  I felt very... how do you say?... "experienced."  I knew a five-year-old-Noah would have much better family-finding skills than a two-year-old-Gus.  Thankfully, a lifeguard reunited us with our son after about 10 minutes.

Before you write me off as a careless, irresponsible, neglectful parent, read this next anecdote:

One Sunday, we had just come home from Mass.  Gus had been upset in the car, likely over a consequence he earned.  We all bounded into the house to eat, play, and relax.  The kids immediately started playing a game while I was in the kitchen.  I noticed that Gus was not playing with the other kids.

"Hey, where's Gus?"

"He's hiding in the other room," the kids told me.

Gus, age 4

"Ah, okay."  You see, Gus loves to hide.  It's pretty much his favorite hobby.  Plus, he's pretty darn good at it.  He finds good hiding places and waits.  Silently.  Once, we were at my cousins' and realized he was missing.  We started frantically searching and calling for him and walking up the street, only to find him hiding from us up in a tree.  So, when Miriam and Noah told me he was hiding, I didn't think anything of it.

I then remembered I needed an oil change and beckoned my knight to go get me one.  About ten minutes later, the phone rang.  I answered.  It was Nick.

"I have a stowaway," he says.

My jaw dropped.  Apparently, after Mass, Gus had never come into the house.  He had climbed into the trunk of the mini van.  And sat there.  Silently.  Even while Nick started the car and drove all the way to the shop to get the oil change.

Okay.  Now you can judge me as a careless, irresponsible, neglectful parent.  I will stop there.  I am prudently restraining this post to instances of losing my boys.  The girl stories might show up in the future.

Last one.  I promise.

Yesterday, Timmy stood up by himself.  I look at him and my heart wrenches.  In nine short months, I have seen this beautiful baby get pricked and poked, undergo blood transfusions, learn to crawl, eat dirt, laugh uncontrollably, and bring joy to our home in an indescribable way.  Now that Timmy is this incredible mobile and social being, I see that I am losing my baby.

Then

Now(ish)

Then I look at Gus.  He has become such a sweet kid who loves school and adores all his siblings.  He'll do anything to please Miriam and Noah, and he'll do anything to protect Lucy and Timmy.

And Noah.  He reads now, and plays piano.  He can beat any video game and build any Lego kit you give him.

The 20 minutes I lost Gus in the mall felt like an eternity.  Yet, what's even scarier is that what they all say might actually be true: these years go by too fast.  I pray that when I lose my boys, I will have at least gained three more wonderful, God-fearing men in my life.

Miriam Received the Sacrament of Reconciliation (Feb. 2019, age 8)

She's a Girl Like No Other! (Lucy, age 2.5)

Fake-Sleeping Selfie Taken by My #1